I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
