Define "chronic" masturbator.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Is it penis luge time yet?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
