This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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