Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
