Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
he fucked my hip out of place.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize