her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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