You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
