Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
