you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
A bitchslap is in order.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
