PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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