the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He? As in you personified your dick?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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