Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I looked at my own cervix.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
That accounts for only three of the penises
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
