okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize