i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
