I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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