i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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