Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Four minutes until I can fart!
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
