I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
