You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Randomize