I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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