Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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