In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
one two three fourrrrnication!
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.