summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one