It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
We need a shit load of segways right now
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
