Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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