"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Please don't give away my fajitas
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