I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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