but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
