where am i from again
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
