You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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