We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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