people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
