Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
