I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
