And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Drake has all the answers
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
