By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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