So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
