I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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