You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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