Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
