I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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