Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
