On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
