we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
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