So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
