i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
