i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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