Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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