Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
we should paint friendship bongs
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