just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
