Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
