all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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